For a child, his or her parents are the first teachers. They learn from the actions of their parents. In fact, they learn more through actions than by words. But sometimes, words can play havoc in a child’s life. It can destroy their self-esteem. They can develop an inferiority complex too.
So, here are some things you should never say to your child. Have look.
A) You are good for nothing
You would have heard your parents saying this often. Whenever you get poor grades in school, fail in a class exam, come last in a race, or even struggle to tie your shoes’ laces, your parent would have said, ‘You are good for nothing’. Little did the parents realise that such words or phrases have a detrimental effect on their child. The child takes it seriously what their parents say as they believe and trust their parents whole-heartedly. In the long run, the child grows up believing he cannot do anything good in life.
B) Neighbour’s child is doing well, why aren’t you?
Some parents think comparing their child with their neighbour’s kid would motivate their ward to work harder and do well. But it could have a negative impact on the child. The parents should identify the problem in their child rather than putting their ward under pressure with undue comparison. The parents should understand every child is different and has his or her own unique traits.
C) I don’t know what you will do with your life
Parents try to force their dream on their children and get frustrated if their kids are not able to catch up. Even before the kid is born, the parents decide the future of the child. And when the child is unable to live up to expectations, the parents reprimand the child stating that they don’t know what their child would do with his or her life. In other words, parents demean their child and hurt their self-esteem. The child then create a wall around him and withdraw into a shell.
D) You are a burden for me
Some parents do get frustrated with life, job and family. And they pour all their frustrations on their little ones as they are the most vulnerable and cannot answer back. Some parents even resort to raising their hands on the kids to vent out their frustration and may say the child is burden for them. The child would just feel useless and worthless at the time. In no circumstances, the parents should say such a thing. Remember to vent out your frustration in positive ways such as exercise or running but never on your kids.
If you wish to raise happy kids, be careful with your choice of words. Your words can make or break their life.